If I could forget feelings

It’s easy, to fall for someone who you think cared enough about you to let you into their life. Until you start to see how they are with others, yet the moment you say something of the like. You become disliked in an instant,yet you still see something in them. What is it? can you describe it? it can’t be hope when you clearly have been forgotten could it?

How I long to forget, if I could forget my feelings. Then I would at least take solace in knowing, that I too can move on with my life. Without pain and without regret, much in the same way I was forgotten by her. How much easier, that would be and how much happier it would make her too, but what would that make me?

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Going nowhere fast

Have you ever watched the one you truly deeply love, start to drift away from you and you don’t know why? then found your mind racing a mile a minute with all the possibilities and wondered if you were right the entire time?

It’s almost like going out the door and walking down the road with no destination in mind, you keep thinking of all these possibilities and all these maybe’s and if’s. It’s not a good place to be either, because at the end of it all you will look back and notice that the one you were getting all worked up over? hasn’t moved at all and you are the one who has spent all this time getting nowhere all on your own. Was it worth it? i think not, better off talking about it and if it wasn’t meant to be? then so be it. It’s time to move on, if it is meant to be though? then remember that love is patient and understanding. No matter how bad things get, it can always be resolved simply by talking about it. 

Everything falls into place on it’s own

A few minutes ago, I saw a couple outside who were touring Vancouver all the way from Spain. They were trying to figure out a way to get to the team store, they didn’t speak english well and so me being fluent in Spanish I directed them.

Upon entering the store we had a chat in Spanish about the building, they asked if they could look inside etc. All the while we are doing this a couple of girls from the store were confused about what I was saying, but I was polite to them inquiring about the tour pricing etc for the tourists and translating. I guess I’m not as much a monster that I was painted to be was I? within a few minutes we were off, the guests absolutely loved the building and took tons of pictures. They had a blast!

After the tour I brought them back to the store to let them shop some more, as I opened the door though Ronda was again ready to bolt away from me. I opened the door for her as she motioned towards it and simply greeted hello, I guess I’ll never win her trust as long as she believes what my backstabbing coworker says about me but. My conscience is clear and I’ve done nothing wrong, I’m grateful about god giving me the chance to show at least two of the girls at the store that I can be a decent guy.

I guess what I’m saying is, life can be cruel and incredibly unfair but if you have the patience? good things will come your way.

A father’s note to his angel

Whenever my heart was broken, you’ve always been there to mend it back together with just a smile. Even when I was madly furious about something you always approached me and held me tight, somehow you knew how much I held in even without my saying anything and you never gave up. I thought I knew unconditional love, but then I found out how to redefine unconditional when you called me “Dad”.